Week Two

[Dustin McDreamy]

And holy shit. DPoV in the game already. And IDK how I feel about Porsche potentially choosing the HoH D:

But I'm excited to see those two powers that fuck the power rankings. That'll make me lol.

[Brian Hart]

Oh my. This week is gonna be cray!! Does anyone think that Shane/James noms could backfire with both ending up safe?

[Dustin McDreamy]

I hope so. I would appreciate them both staying.

[Chenbot]

I feel like some people are screwing up. Rachel said it perfectly in her DR. All Veterans are screwed now. They are now fighting against each other and it's going to be all of their downfalls. It's BBR11 all over again. The egos from Porsche/Ian's side too, you think that this week is the end of the game or something? You are making yourselves out to be HUGE targets and using all of those powers together let's the whole house know that you ARE actually all together.

I don't expect James and Shane to both make it through the week.

[Cassandra Waldon]

HIEEEEEEEEE! The only two time finalist and two time winner Cassandra Waldon is here, fashionably late just like in AS3   which brings me to my first point: Julie, I don't appreciate you throwing shade about how you didn't finish AS3 episodes because "nobody important played" when HELLO, Cassandra's return from the dead and slaying of Dick in the Jury questions was legendary and epic and really does deserve to get documented if I do say so myself.

My second point (god how does this always work out so perfectly), Dick, nice to see you again I guess, hope you recovered from AS3. Lori and Drew, glad to see you two as always. Brian and Dustin, I think we've interacted at some point? You guys witnessed history with my victories at least so that's worth a hello. Jason, we didn't get to talk much in AS3 but nice to see you again. Anyone else, nice to meet you all! I know it might be intimidating to be in the presence of a two time winner but you'll learn to get used to it soon enough.

Thirdly, I have no clue what's going on so if anyone wants to bring me up to date that'd be lovely. I recognize a few faces so I'm guessing returning players are involved somehow? Out of the few I recognize...

Dominic ~ didn't get to talk to him much in AS3 since he was always busy as fuck and he was evicted around the same time I returned from the dead, but he seemed nice?

James ~ I'm sure his bitter ass STILL holds a grudge that I didn't bring him to the final two in season 11 but I was cackling so hard when I found out that he randomly drew me in the AS3 sweepstake and begrudgingly somewhat rooted for me to win. I would normally say he could do one but maybe I should be the better person?

Jun ~ alol this bitch. I wonder if she knows that I played in her Endurance Recycled (original name right?) game and trolled the SHIT out of her, exposed her as a cheater since she rigged the game, and made her delete the board   but we made nice in AS3 so maybe she doesn't know who I am? She's okay in my book I guess.

Porsche ~ I think I was kinda aligned with her at one point in AS3? By one point I mean the one round I was in before I was voted out the first time alol but she's alright!

Rachel ~ ugh. Why she was even brought back the first time as a fourth boot in season 11 was beyond me. I actually wrote a HUGE rant about her in the beginning of AS3 and it's ever so appropriate:

Rachel ~ ugh this bitch? Really? Let me tell you something about Rachel Plecner. She thinks she's smart. She thinks she's funny. She thinks she's better than everyone. All three of those are false. Quite Jamiely I don't know how she got cast (and I'm sure all of the viewers will find that ironic come from me but I couldn't care less) and I'm pissed. Rachel's one of those people that is extremely bitter for no reason whatsoever. She played in BBPearl (which contrary to popular belief, Libra did not cohost) so I saw how unjustly bitter she can be, but I digress. Rachel and I were opposing alliances and reading her DRs she'd talk about how I don't exist, need chicken and purple drank or whatever the fuck, and she picked some hideous sock puppet of me? If you're going to talk shit, YOU HAVE TO BE FUNNY. Har har har, black people love chicken and Kool-Aid, how original Rachel. You win once again. So anyways when she was on the block she gave some desperate plea to me about how I'm just a nobody and I'm being used and yada yada and how I should flip to her side. Meanwhile I'm associated in a group of seven and at least four other people have bigger targets than me. So should I have flipped? Hell to the fucking no. She was weirdly jealous of me and would be like "why won't you vote with me?" And I'd be like "why are you so obsessed with me?" So then in her eviction week I was like "Rachel, I can't vote to keep you because they think you're lesbian." I mean I couldn't have lesbian in my alliance! There would be girls there in their bathing suits. I mean right, she was a lesbian! And then she went to the Pre Jury House and was calling me Matulu and she was totally weird and now I guess she's on crack. But anyways, I'm positive she's going to come after me because she's a jealous ho. She's the Jenna Lewis to my Tina Wesson. Nobody really knows why she's here or how she got here, but she's going to be a raging demon because she was the fourth evicted or some shit. PS BTW using Daniele Donato gifs and quotes to express your thoughts is not cute.

But in spite of all of that and in spite of her evicting me WEEK ONE... I kinda like her now? Once I came back into the game we formed some weird frenemyship and as much as she hates the way I play the game and is frustrated that I won twice and she can't get to the finals yet, I forced her to respect me? That's more than I can get from some of these jealous hoes so for the fact that she's actually willing to be the bigger person and respect me (as much as she doesn't want to), I can respect her.

And that's five... I know that Shane and Ian are from season 13 but that came at a hard time in my life right after Hurricane Sandy so I didn't really get to view much, but I think Shane won? I would say that's a good club to be in but I mean James and Enzo lol. I'll try to catch up on Recycled 13 eventually and form my opinions. The eight returnee... I don't even know who it is so that just shows the irrelevance.

But yes, bow down bitches, the quen b Cassandra Waldon has arrived 

[Chenbot]

I feel like this is the biggest entrance in Recycled history. JEN Johnson is ROLLING in her Recycled grave.

[Dustin McDreamy]

Sept 2, 2013 15:09:17 GMT -6 Chenbot said:

I don't expect James and Shane to both make it through the week.

How are they both not making it? Is it a double eviction!?
Ignore me. I'm a tired college student.

[Lori Valenti]

Cassandra! I missed you!

So what is going on that I'm missing? Is the HoH gonna put up two vets and then all hell is gonna break lose! Please explain!!


Thanks!

[Chenbot]

Ian is going to make the most OTT nomination ceremony JUST because he won HOH. He, Porsche, and Rachel (unfortunately) have outside relationships with some noobs, so they think they run the entire house. Well Rachel isn't as delusional about it.

Anyway, James and Shane started to form a counter alliance against them and they included Andrew (who has outside relations with Porsche and will die for her ATM) and Andrew reported back to Porsche, therefore Ian is doing the dirt work. Porsche will use her Swapper to make James/Shane be in the Yellow of the Power Rankings and David (outside relation) will secure James/Shane/Dominic in the Yellow by stealing half of one of their points.

It will make Porsche/Ian/David all look like huge targets when they, especially Porsche should be wanting to be UTR.

Cassandra Waldon all that happened last week is Ian created an alliance of him, Porsche, Rachel, Jessie, Adria, and David. Adria spilled the beans to Shane. Later Jessie spilled the beans. Shane/James started to form a counter alliance and now that Ian is in power they ridicule people who just wanted to even the playing field.

As much as they think Shane/James are going balls to the wall to win. I don't think either is expecting much. James is obviously not into it as much as he usually is and I've talked to Shane about this season. He wouldn't DIE if he was voted out next. He'll save those tears for allstars.

[Drew Daniel]

Cassandra <3

F2?

[Cassandra Waldon]

Drewby <33333

[Dustin McDreamy]

Sept 3, 2013 18:16:12 GMT -6 Cassandra Waldon said:

Drewby <33333

It's DrewbIE not DrewbY

[Drew Daniel]

I always thought it was Drewbey

[Chenbot]

I. LOVE. VETO PICKS. Random.org <3

[Dustin McDreamy]

Sept 3, 2013 21:47:28 GMT -6 Chenbot said:

I. LOVE. VETO PICKS. Random.org <3

(James draws a chip from the bag)

James: Dustin's Choice

Entire House: (confused)

(Dustin enters the house)

Dustin: I choose.......me

(Dustin wins his first Recycled competition. Hell freezes over. Jun takes up a life of chastity. Drewbie becomes the world's biggest party animal and gets 87 women pregnant. Kim Kardashian reveals she's secretly a man. Kanye reveals he's secretly a woman. North West still has a shitty ass name. Ellen DeGeneres and Neil Patrick Harris come out as straight. The sex tapes of all my OTPs is released. The economy is fixed. Whatever is happening in Syria stops. Taco Bell comes out with Doritos Locos Tacos that actually taste like the fucking Doritos this time. Hopscotch is renamed to Squarejump in order to help prevent alcoholism in toddlers. Oprah goes bankrupt due to cocaine addiction and OWN is renamed to OWN'D! Pomp and Circumstance is no longer played at graduations and is replaced with Gas Pedal. Adam finally confesses his love for me, we get married, and have three children, three cats, and 1 yorkshire terrier all of which are named after television characters. A woman becomes president and makes long-term abortions of up to 1080 months legal. The blue shell in Mario Kart doesn't fuck over anymore potential victors. Children in schools no longer learn the quadratic formula, but instead, actual fucking shit they need in their adult life. Sun Drop soda is renamed to Sun Rise after the discovery that it shares similar ingredients with Viagra. Tornadoes now avoid trailer parks, presumeably because Honey Boo Boo used her television money to create a national chain of trailer parks titled "BooBoosville".)